What Men Want

In this age of technology, we have weather apps, financial apps, shopping, maps, email, instant messaging, Words with Friends, Draw Something, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Kindle, iTunes, and (of course) Angry Birds downloaded on our smartphones to inform and entertain us at any time, day or night. We are constantly connected. That little screen puts anything we want in the world in the palm of our hands.

Hubs has a poker game that he plays during his down time. However, when he registered, all of the user names that he usually prefers were taken. Tongue in cheek, he tried "Sissy Sue," the name of our little, female dachshund, and it was accepted. He went with it.

The other day while we camped out waiting for a very delayed doctor's appointment, Hubs pulled out his phone and started gambling. It was then that he confided that although it was a free online game, he had never had to jump through hoops to earn the fake cash to play. Men around the world gifted "Sissy Sue" with fake money presents all the time.

Men.
using a poker game phone application.
want.
my.
husband.

They like the idea of a delicate, little player at their table. They think he is cute.

I am sure they don't picture a stocky, 6'4", bearded farmer when they send Sissy Sue the cash to play another hand. That old cartoon with the overweight man in boxers sitting at a computer screen pretending to be a sexy, 20-something female is burned into my mind.

I don't know if I should be amused or scared.

 

Salisbury Steak with Mushroom Gravy

(adapted from Cooking Light)

1/3 cup onion, chopped (divided)

1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

1/4 teaspoon kosher salt

2 garlic cloves, minced

1 pound ground beef

olive oil

1 tablespoon butter

2 cups cremini mushrooms, quartered

1/3 cup dry red wine

2 cups beef stock

1 tablespoon flour

Combine 1/4 cup onion, pepper, salt, garlic, and beef.

Shape into 4 patties.

Heat oil in skillet over medium-high heat.

Add patties; browning on each side (about 3 minutes).

Remove and set aside tenting with foil to keep warm.

Melt butter in the pan.

Add mushrooms and saute until tender.

Stir in wine and remaining onion and cook a couple of minutes until onion is tender.

Combine broth and flour.

Add to pan and bring to a boil.

Cook until thickened.

Add patties to pan and simmer a few more minutes to heat beef through. (Serves 4)

I am David Copperfield.

I am a magician. Truly. I have found one recipe that can only be described as magic.

Wave the magic wand. Take some shrimp; toss them with some spices; saute them; cook up some corn, beans, and salsa together, and abracadabra! It's magic.

OK. You don't get it. I am sorry. The magic is that this simple, spicy, satisfying dish can be anything you want it to be.

Need a snack or appetizer? Chop up the shrimp and serve it all as a dip with crispy corn chips.

Feel like a roll up your shirt sleeves and dig in casual meal? Toast some corn or flour tortillas; slice an avocado; squeeze a lime; and devour some really delicious tacos.

Want a salad? Forget all those limp lettuces. Hot, cold, or room temperature, this.is.good. Really. (And, could be served on a bed of romaine.)

Need to feed a bigger group? Whip up some rice and guacamole as sides, and nobody will be able to keep their knife and fork away.

Magic Spicy Shrimp and Corn Salad answers every need you ever had...except maybe for cake...or chocolate...BUT, it is light enough that you should still have room for dessert.

I told you. Magic.

Magic Spicy Shrimp and Corn Salad

(adapted from Cooking Light)

1 tablespoon chili powder (I used Ancho Chile Powder)

1/2 teaspoon garlic powder

1/2 teaspoon cumin

1 teaspoon kosher salt

1 1/2 pounds medium shrimp, peeled and deveined

1-2 tablespoons olive oil

juice of a lime (divided)

2 ears sweet corn, kernels cut from cob

1 pint bottled salsa (I used my Basic Canned Salsa. This is where you will really adjust the spice of the dish to your taste. Use a mild salsa or heat it up, if you like.)

1 can (15 ounces) black beans, drained and rinsed

1/4 cup fresh cilantro, chopped

Combine the first 4 ingredients in a bowl.
Add shrimp and toss to coat.
Heat oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat.
Add shrimp and saute until cooked through.
Add juice of half of the lime.
Remove the shrimp from the pan.
Add the corn; saute briefly.
Stir in salsa and beans and bring to a simmer.
Remove from heat and add the juice of the other half of the lime and the cilantro.
Depending on final dish desired, stir shrimp into corn and bean mixture or serve shrimp on top. (Serves 4.)